March 13, 2003

The Big Bad Banana

Letting go of things can be extremely difficult. Somehow we have the notion that the more I have, the more secure I will become. Therefore if I have something, I cannot get rid of it because I may need it. I may need to be secure of some future time. You never know about the future.

We all know the result of this kind of thinking. Little houses dotted across the landscape of America with broken, rusted out cars sitting around the property, stacks of used corrugated metal for some future "roofing" project, weathered, warped lumber stacked beside the house, broken toys for a future grandchild and parts of lawn mowers to be used when we landscape the yard. We think of these as little security nuggets.

Of course, not every neighborhood is like that.

The nicer subdivisions have covenants and restrictions regarding property appearance and maintenance.

Those of us who live there would never want to live like that. Besides, we would be contacted by the neighborhood association. We stack our stuff in attics, garages, closets and green and gray plastic storage sheds, made especially for the yard. If we have more "security nuggets" than we can store in these places, we rent off-site storage units.

My good friend, the late Ron Mehl, who pastored what is probably Oregon's largest church, Beaverton Foursquare Church, told a story many years ago that I have never forgotten. He asks the question, "Do you know how to catch monkeys in the jungle?"

He continued, "Here's how."

"We all know monkeys love bananas. Actually, they provide great nutrition for the monkeys. You know, potassium and all that. They also taste good."

"To catch a monkey in the jungle, you secure a small-mouth glass jar in an open area. Place a ripe banana in the jar. Then hide behind some bushes with a net. Soon the monkey will appear, see the banana and reach into the small mouth jar. Because his fist is tightly clenched around the banana, he is unable to get the banana and the clenched fist back through the mouth of the jar. Although the monkey sees you coming with the net, he still thinks he needs the banana more than freedom. And, maybe he won't get caught anyway."

Some of us are highly organized; our property is not littered with junk, nor are our closets, garages, and attics filed to over-capacity Man, we don't even have an off-site storage unit.

But there is a banana, which can be fatal. It's stored in the closet of our heart and our emotion. Bitterness from hurts, disappointments, unmet expectations, personal failures and the personal betrayal by someone you trusted, can all add up to one big bad banana.

These things can actually take on a certain "necessary" aspect in our life. We feel we must hold these emotions of hatred and bitterness because those people were wrong and they deserve justice. And somehow hating them is administrating some kind of justice in their hatred. In a twisted way, some people find a sense of mission in their hatred.

My son, Gary Todd, and I watched the movie, "The Count of Monte Cristo," recently. He had seen it before, this was my first time. Great movie. There is a line in the movie where Edmond Dantes, who becomes the Count, is dealing with his hatred and bitterness that has resulted from the loss of the woman he loved and planned to marry and years spent in prison in solitary confinement although innocent, looks at his most trusted friend and says, "Please don't try to take away my hatred. That's all I've got."

In the end, if we hold tightly to these kinds of things, we will die. First socially, then emotionally, and perhaps even physically. For sure, spiritually.

There is great wisdom that was written thousands of years ago, yet contemporary to our individual life. Culture and society change. People basically do not.

"Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. For I am about to do a brand new thing. See, I have already begun. Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness ... I will create rivers for them in the desert."
Isaiah 43:18-19

Excerpt from Gary's new book, Why Am I Doing This?